Generally speaking, people are pretty good at keeping our lab’s kitchen clean. They wash their own dishes, put food away in the fridge, throw out their garbage after meals.
But people aren’t always perfect, and sometimes somebody leaves some paper plates on the table, or an unwashed mug ends up sitting in the sink. This makes nobody happy.
The other morning I came in to find some napkins and paper plates on the table. On top of them was a big handwritten paper sign. It said: “It’s rude to leave your stuff lying around.”
I could understand the frustration of the person who found the napkins and paper plates lying on the table. And I could see how they would want to send a clear message to the perpetrator.
But I also could see what this whole scene might look like from the perspective of an outside visitor to our lab. “Who are these people?” she might ask herself. “Are they engaged in some sort of ongoing domestic war? Do they even like each other?”
I did what I usually do when I see stuff lying around. I picked it all up off the table and I threw it in the trash — including the handwritten paper sign.
For me this is a typical response. When I see the occasional unwashed dish or mug in the lab sink, I just wash it and put it in the drying rack.
There is a part of me that wonders whether I am being an enabler, whether maybe there is a better path. But if that “better path” is to shame people, I’d prefer to stick to the path I’m on.
After all, as a faculty member it’s part of my job to invite visitors to our lab, so I always need to see what our lab looks like from the perspective of those visitors. And when you look at it that way, the occasional dirty mug in the sink is a lot more acceptable than evidence of shaming.
Out of curiosity, could writing a post here be considered “evidence of shaming” the original person who wrote the note?
(As an aside, I fully agree with your typical response).
Yes, I believe it could indeed!
Yet somehow, the idea of writing one’s thoughts on-line, outside of the actual space in question, feels like a different speech act than writing one’s thoughts upon a piece of paper within the physical kitchen.
I wonder why that is. Perhaps it is because within the actual kitchen, one has the option of simply taking care of the problem, whereas on-line there is no such option.
Cyberspace is a place of pure discussion. You don’t have the option to simply wash the dishes.